Know
Written by Major Tom
Filed under: Personal and Family, Philosophy
August 4, 2007
Know one’s self. Know thyself. I have heard or read about this saying, principle, advise, or guiding words a myriad times before yet this afternoon, it was one main major point of discussion that I had with a friend that had came over this morning, and the conversation lasted till early afternoon that I felt like it was old days once again. Family life and work had somehow stave away extra time from our routine like for example this friend who had been camping in a tent for nearly half a year now somewhere in the mountains, about 400 miles away from here, supervising over a harvesting of Gemilina trees that his olds had planted several years ago.
Tony is pretty sharp on these things, ruminations about facts of life—just as I am perhaps when my mind is clear.
The way to unravel the secret and happiness and contentment he said is through “knowing oneself fully” and then being comfortable with it. The others become a mirror of the self that in every moment that one speaks or interact with another individual, there lies the reflection of the true identity of the converser and thereon—through this mirror effect—is the means to find the true self.
If one carries a lively disposition when one speaks, the other communicator becomes lively as well—most of the time at least. If the first speaker interacts in a lonesome manner, the other person becomes forlorn as well. This is the mirror of the self, according to him. The individual becomes the reflection of the other, and by this means, one would be able to find the true self.
When you are happy, I am happy as well. If you are down, I am down as well. So therefore, he says that if we find ourselves in the other people that we speak to, they become a reflection of our selves and therefore lies the path towards “fully knowing ourselves”, a one good step or means to unravel the mystery of our own being. For in fact, even in high school we have been inculcated with the “four windows” principle of the self, where one window is the “self” as the individual himself/herself knows it, the second one as the “self” that others know about, the third window being the “self” that everybody knows about, including the individual himself or herself, and the fourth window being the “self” that no one really knows, not even the individual himself or herself.
I for one had conformed to this idea—to know our true selves wholly in order to gain happiness—even when I believe that the pursuit of happiness is never-ending because for one, how would contentment persist if one does not know one’s real self in the first place. Who am I? What do I desire? What do I intend to attain? Where am I going?
Yet, I digress for a while and have forwarded a countering thought to this idea of “knowing oneself” in other to gain happiness because in the first place, happiness is a very relative fact. Rich people are happy but they can be unhappy also, perhaps for reason not of lack of things, but by lack of meaningful activities.
Poor people are often thought to be full of discontent but they could be happy and contented as well even if they have lack of things, for they might have more meaningful activities. And happiness I said to Tony is a force or fact of life that could not be put under the control of man, that not even the brightest scientist would be able to get a full grasp of it, and state empirically and powerfully that “Voila! Eureka! Omigosh! I finally found the formula for instant happiness!”
Unlike instant noodles, happiness could not really be had by just adding hot water into a small plastic contraption and stir it gently until the noodles are soft and tender.
Sometimes I said, to know our true selves even becomes the instigator of discontent. If I know myself, myself wants this and that. My real self wants to drive a Jaguar in the stony streets of Zamboanga. If you ask me really what I want, I want to have a huge dollar account and be sipping piñacola in Bahamas all day, all night—all year round. Of course, this is superfluous and I am just half jesting when I say this. But if you survey the population, perhaps 90% would respond that their idea of happiness is to have great fortune and then have great meaningful activities—like sipping fruit juices in a Caribbean shore.
So it’s better that I readjust my knowledge of my real self so that I could readjust my aim for happiness. At times, we need to shove our real selves under the carpet or kept inside a cupboard, to be taken out when needed.
But hey, if I’ve got to readjust the level of aims I need to have, I need first to find my “true self”.
So therefore, Tony is right. To know oneself is the way to contentment and then have happiness. Not exactly. To know one true self is “one” way to unravel the secret of happiness. There might some other way, you know.
i guess true happiness does not depend on how much material things one person has. it’s funny that as i bloghop, i found that there are a number of bloggers who are intent on this topic - happiness and knowing thyself. perhaps this is a necessity nowadays, ie, to find true happiness by knowing one’s self. i couldnt agree more with the blogger that i read that you get to know more of yourself with people around you, not alone with yourself. it helps to interact to know who you are.
Comment by bingskee — August 4, 2007 @ 1:35 pm
This is almost similar to the message of a tibetan buddhist lama sakyong mipham rinoche in his video titled “what about me?”.
The lama said:
What about me?
That’s my first thought every morning.
What happened to me is the last thought every night…..
And you know what? When you’re happy, I’m Happy.
That’s the formula. First YOU, then me. That’s all Happiness is.
It’s just the heart being free.
Comment by myepinoy — August 4, 2007 @ 2:58 pm
To bing: Some say that aloneness or spending time with yourself is also one way of really knowing yourself, but now as I surmise, after all these thoughts forwarded, knowing thyself is more complete when one sees oneself in the others. The interaction offers more insights than just evaluating the self by one’s lonesome.
Comment by Major Tom — August 4, 2007 @ 6:18 pm
To myepinoy: I had such feeling that some prophets or sages must have elucidated this topic before and true to form, Bhuddism says clearly about it. Perhaps, the pursuit of happiness is suct extant in man’s quest in this mortal world. It is always there, desire, want, needs; like the air we breathe and it is but reasonable for us to think about it, and unravel its mysteries.
Comment by Major Tom — August 4, 2007 @ 6:21 pm
i certainly agree, major tom. at times, when we finally get to understand ourselves, we are exposed to external forces that make us rethink of our choices and our own personal lives. and for as long as we all have good control of our own selves, we could be comfortable with the our own version of happiness.
nice post!
Comment by intsik — August 4, 2007 @ 9:28 pm
i guess its easier to make other people happy if we ourselves are happy , and to have true hapiness i guess i have to agree that knowing thyself is the anwer.
Comment by iskoo — August 4, 2007 @ 9:40 pm
Hmm, I always thought that happiness is having a fat bank account, a hot woman to share your bed with every night, and a couple of Mercedes and BMWs in your garage…
That we see a mirror of ourselves in our friends only proves that misery loves company, haha.
Comment by snglguy — August 4, 2007 @ 11:36 pm
I had experienced some good times, some would call it happy times, but I don’t call happiness. Now it is not the best of times, financially, but health wise it is, but knowing that all the years I was building bit by bit the foundation of a very strong statue that will stand as the basis of knowing of what I had done for many others, beside myself and that always more than enough to celebrate life. and I call that knowing myself, my limitations, my capabilities and it would i consider some kind of happiness as I already experienced all the rest.
Comment by vic — August 6, 2007 @ 12:30 am
To intsik: Thanks for the nice note. For certain, control is also one important element in our quest for happiness and contentment. Without it, everything might become out of hand, and chaotic at most—our lives would be if we ain’t got control.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 8:25 am
To iskoo: I wonder how it could be otherwise…it should be that way and none other.
Glad your blogging once again.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 8:29 am
To sngl: Yeah, that’s also what they’ve been saying since old times, that misery loves company. It’d be better if we stave away downtrodenness if we are to cimmubicate with others, that way, we won’t be sharing “misery”….as it is.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 8:31 am
To vic: It’s good you put a lot of thought on this vic. I never really did for I just flow with my emotions; I am happy sometimes, sad at times. Maybe, I should be putting thoughts to these similarly and improved myself, especially on the ‘happiness’ section.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 8:34 am
To vic: It’s good you put a lot of thought on this vic. I never really did for I just flow with my emotions; I am happy sometimes, sad at times. Maybe, I should be putting thoughts to these similarly and improved myself, especially on the ‘happiness’ section.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 8:36 am
Absolutely true that knowing oneself and more importantly having a guiding belief of what matters most on life is key to contentment.
Liiving with miserable people makes one feeling miserable too. Most people really live to show off on others. A test for this would be - would you stretch your pocket to the max and put yourself in great debt buy a BMW if you don’t have friends or know ANYBODY in your neighborhood?
It is true that loners who live alone are simply content on necessities and surviving well and have no pressure to acquire things
and bury themsleves in debt >
Comment by bw — August 6, 2007 @ 11:11 am
This is a very deep and subjective post Major. Happiness is different to everyone, they think it’s a goal to attain or a destination or a treasure to find. Not that I’m an expert in such pursuits but happiness is a choice we have to make everyday and every moment. Whatever situations we are in, its our reactions to particular situations or how we look or define things whether we would be happy or not.
Comment by Ferdz — August 6, 2007 @ 11:59 am
To BW: Nice discussion of the subject matter buffwing. I’ve seen those with lots of things but still unhappy and then those who virtually have nothing but they are gleeful. It’s a mystery I think. But to this puzzle lies the importance of knowing ourselves and then find true happiness.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 1:49 pm
To Ferdz: Then I must say ‘positive thinking’ is a must-have element in this pursuit. Reminds me of the new-wave band TPOH. or The Endless Pursuit of Happiness…I wonder what happened to them, they were so good.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 1:51 pm
oh gawd…I just ranted about happiness in my latest entry hehe
I dunno…could be true that knowing your self will somehow lead you to happiness. But each one of us has a “blind self” and without knowing that blind self, how can you wholly know your self?
Comment by verns — August 6, 2007 @ 2:01 pm
I don’t know… I think I’ve always been happy… no matter how much problems I have… even if I complain sometimes. I agree that knowing myself helps a lot. So does being kind to people and having loads and loads of faith.
Comment by Toe — August 6, 2007 @ 5:05 pm
To Toe: Oh, this is good and I feel happy as well for you although in my case, happines comes merely half-the-time, or a morsel more than that. I am not saying that there is unhappiness that I feel sometimes, but you know worries and anxieties is but an everyday reality for me.
Comment by Major Tom — August 6, 2007 @ 6:54 pm
I know this might sound trite (even contrived), Major Tom, but I’d say it anyway because this is what I believe in: Knowing the Lord in a personal way is the key to joy (as opposed to happiness, joy is more lasting; more solid…it’s not affected by external factors like wealth and prestige or poverty and despair).
Not to say that knowing one’s self is not important. On the contrary, the Bible says that we should search our hearts, know our thoughts, and weigh our intentions. Doing so will improve our relationship with the Lord, with our fellowmen, and with ourself. And that will make us happy — and joyful, too.
Comment by Jayred — August 6, 2007 @ 10:54 pm
To jayred: Thanks for the elaboration Jayred; I never really thought ’bout the difference between the feeling of joy and the feeling of happiness previously. I believe you and the Lord will always sustain joy to those who have faith and belief, for as HE sais, every material thing is but fleeting, but hope and redemption that He provides is eternal and everlasting.
Comment by Major Tom — August 7, 2007 @ 8:28 am
I have to say I’m happy the way my life is going on right now but I always get the feeling I want a bit more to be honest…
human nature I suppose
Comment by pining — August 7, 2007 @ 8:26 pm
Just remember: “a man is as happy as he makes his mind to be.”
Comment by Abaniko — August 7, 2007 @ 9:31 pm
Knowledge is power. And the first thing to know is ourselves. How can you control something you do not know? And sometimes, human needs should be controlled .. and often we interchange greed with need.
Know ourselves … our real nature, that we are more than this shell, that we have divine origin. If we know this, then it will be hard to succumb to despair or doubt.
As I am saying this, I know that often I forget. And bully for me.
Ay naku .. so serious. Si Major Tom kasi. “)
Comment by annamanila — August 7, 2007 @ 10:32 pm